I'll Never Be A good Friend....

It's 4.49am, and I'm still wide awake. I just want to confess here, the reason why I don't have facebook because I just hate going down to all the cheezy memory lane.... Browsing pages of friends makes me hurt. I know, I'm suppose to be happy with their happiness, with their great CAREER, nice figure even after deliver more babies than me and I don't know.... like better in everything compared to me???? Ok, now, I'm just being ungrateful.

The thing is, I just browsed my Aberdeen's good-friend in fb just now (through Sayang fb). She looked so happy with her new baby. She always has a good career. And her house is soooo nice, just kinda house that I was drooling over every time I browsed the Aberdeen Properties website. Honestly, I'm soooo happy for her.... I'm just happy because I know she is happy. But too bad, just because I can't handle the low-esteemed situation I'm currently facing, I just can't tell her a simple 'Congratulations!' It's really bad....

The thing is, she was there when I was alone last time!!! We shared a good laughed and a good cry. She was there when I deliver my baby, bought present for him as well, but too bad, I don't even have the guts to express my happiness...

^Sigh^ My dear friend, to see the smile in your eyes, honestly, really mean something to me... I really hope, when I'm more positive me, we can meet again one day... InsyaAllah.... Forgive me, for never be a good friend to you....